It was jarringly easy to sow the seeds of doubt into the Uchiha in the days that followed, but I supposed I shouldn’t have been surprised. Tensions were uneasy in the buddings of a new world order where clans couldn’t be sure if they could trust each other yet. The Uchiha, however, were optimistic, desperate for the stability and harmony Konohagakure promised, so Madara’s insane ramblings about salvation and a world made of dreams were like sparks to dry kindling.
In the mornings he made a beeline to the Naka Shrine where the tablet was kept and didn’t resurface until the sun was high in the sky. The clansmen within the compound whispered amoungst themselves about how much time he spent down there, what stories he must have been telling himself alone in the dim shrine. They averted their eyes whenever he passed, heads held down in hopes that they wouldn’t be his next target to whom he would rant and rave. Even Chigiri had begun to make comments, casting Madara concerned, yet apprehensive glances, and he would ask if I had noticed any changes in him since he’d returned from his mission.
My answers were always the same: “He does seem a little off lately…”, “He’s not getting much sleep,”, “I’m afraid to ask him what’s wrong.”
This deflection came with the unfortunate side effect of Chigiri making every effort to keep me out of Madara’s home throughout the day, even offering to let me spend the night at his place to avoid sending me back to that house. I assured him that I was fine and that I didn’t want to upset Madara by refusing his generosity. This seemed to steer him away from fretting over me so much when the sun went down, at least.
I didn’t mention a word of the unrest stirring in the Uchiha District to Sasuke during our training sessions. The time I spent under his tutelage was a nice reprieve from the growing unease inside the compound. A week into our endeavour, I even received an offer from Tobirama to lend me some of his scrolls to practise my reading and writing. That certainly kept me busy, even though he made himself scarce after the fact. Surprisingly, while I was studying one of those scrolls at the edge of one of the ponds in the compound, Shirayuki stumbled upon me and took an interest. She made it sound like some sort of burdensome obligation, of course, saying that it was a wonder I had made it this long without such basic skills, but she stayed and helped all the same.
Not two days later was Madara’s exile announced to the village. It was a simple matter to convince Chigiri to report Madara to Hashirama; all it took was a feigned hysterical meltdown about how I had heard Madara scheming to himself about his intentions to overthrow the Hokage in his bedroom one night and how I was so afraid that he was going to hurt someone. I didn’t feel great about deceiving him like that, but the ends justified the means, as the saying went. I hoped that he would understand once this was all over…
Things were quiet for a while after that. Madara’s house was empty again and the Uchiha clan resumed their daily activities with lighter attitudes, if still a bit soured by the alleged treason of their “deranged” leader. Hikaku assumed Madara’s role as he had before, but otherwise things had returned to normal. Unfortunately, I must not have hidden my guilt very well, seeing as Sasuke stopped me in the middle of our training to ask me what was wrong.
“It’s nothing,” I lied without meeting his eyes. “I’m just trying to focus. I think I’m finally—”
“Don’t mistake me for a fool, Kai-san,” Sasuke said, crossing his arms as he pinned me with a hard look. “You’re not yourself today. You haven’t been for some time. What’s distracting you?”
I pressed my lips together, hesitating. I couldn’t exactly tell him the truth without blowing the whole operation, but it was clear he wasn’t going to accept any half-truths or white lies. Sasuke was far more perceptive than he led others to believe. I took a deep breath and stared down at my feet.
“...I can’t talk about it,” I settled on saying instead. “I don’t want to lie to you, sensei, so please don’t ask. I’m sorry.”
Sasuke ruminated on that for a while, his eyes boring holes into my head as if he expected me to crack under the pressure of his scrutiny. When he came to the conclusion that that wasn’t going to happen, however, he finally relented.
“Fine. But don’t let your mind wander while we’re training,” he said. “A shinobi must leave behind his emotions and focus only on the mission at hand. The slightest misstep could—”
“Kill me and my comrades,” I finished, raising my gaze to meet his now. “I know. I won’t let it happen again.”
With a resolute nod, Sasuke uncrossed his arms and directed me back into position for my exercise drills.
“From the top.”
Once our training concluded, Sasuke bid me farewell and took his leave as I picked my way back down the cliff path. I made it to the bottom before I realised something was missing: Chigiri wasn’t waiting for me. His punctuality had become something of a constant; every day he would meet me after training and if we didn’t head straight back to the compound so I could join Hikaku and Kagami, then we went into the village to find something to do. I looked around, but he was nowhere to be found. I tried not to think too much about it, telling myself that he was probably busy or was just running late, but I couldn’t shake this nagging feeling that something wasn’t right.
I was a little more tired than usual after my lessons today, so when I returned to the Uchiha District, I didn’t go looking for Hikaku and Kagami at the training grounds. However, when I caught a glimpse of the area on my way by, I noticed that neither of them were there, either. I thought about shrugging it off and heading back to Madara’s house to pick up on my language studies, but this time I couldn’t ignore that feeling. It only grew worse as I noticed no one was out and about like they usually were. My heart dropped. Something big was going on and while I didn’t know what it was, I knew it couldn’t be good.
I turned on my heel to leave the compound. Maybe if I could find Hashirama or Tobirama, they could help me figure out what was happening and stop it if necessary. Ideally, I would find Hashirama first. As much as I respected Tobirama to a certain degree, I didn’t quite trust him to handle matters of the Uchiha variety with a clear head. I made my way toward the Hokage Tower first since that would be my best bet of hunting down Hashirama. That man was practically glued to his desk.
When I came up to the entrance of the building, however, a pair of jōnin stopped me from going inside.
“Nobody is permitted to see Hokage-sama right now,” one of them said, holding his arm out in front of me. I narrowed my eyes at him.
“And why the hell not?”
The two ninja shared a look.
“He’s in an important meeting. You’ll have to arrange to speak with him tomorrow,” the other said.
“It’s important that I talk to him right now,” I argued. “He needs to know—”
“It can wait. You can’t go inside.”
“You have to let me in!”
“We can’t do that.”
“But—”
“Don’t make us tell you again.”
I paused at that, watching the way their hands moved to hover over the kunai pouches on their legs from the corner of my eye. Did they really plan on using lethal force against someone living in their own village?
What kind of police state bullshit…
I looked between the two of them in turn, weighing my options. I was stronger now, sure, but I didn’t know how to use any jutsu, or weapons, or even how to fight in hand-to-hand combat, for that matter, not to mention that these were two jōnin-level shinobi who had mastered all of those things. All of my training felt so useless right now.
Setting my jaw, I reluctantly turned to leave, but not without giving them both some serious stink eye. What kind of “important meeting” was Hashirama having right now, anyway? We had agreed that he wouldn’t arrange for the Five Kage Summit until after we had dealt with Black Zetsu. I didn’t recall any other major events happening during this interim in the timeline. Had something else changed outside of the direct effects of what we were doing here? Did it have something to do with what the Uchiha clan was up to?
I supposed trying to find Tobirama was out of the question, too, since he served as Hashirama’s advisor in all matters. I still couldn’t divulge what was going on to Sasuke… Dammit, why was my social circle so small? Wasn’t there anyone else I could go to about this?
…Maybe I just needed to calm down. Maybe it was nothing and I was just blowing things way out of proportion. I shouldn’t be so quick to jump to the conclusion that the Uchiha were “up to no good”, as it were. There was a certain, uncomfortable bias in that line of thinking that didn’t sit well with me, even if my gut still insisted something was off.
They must have been having a meeting about something… Didn’t they have secret meetings in the Naka Shrine in canon? Yes, I distinctly remembered when Fugaku had gathered everyone there to discuss the plans of their coup. That must have been where they were gathered. If I could get inside, maybe I could get close enough to figure out what they were talking about…
…They would sense me coming from a mile away if I didn’t keep my chakra in check, though. My anxiety was running high and I could feel the way it affected my energy, how it spiked with every slight twinge of panic. I needed to take a step back and remember my training: Leave behind my emotions and focus on the mission at hand.
Finding a nearby bench to sit on, I closed my eyes and breathed in deep. I needed to subdue my chakra, detach myself from my worry and fear. I had to become invisible.
How about I take over for a while?
A dizziness overcame me then, my consciousness shifting. I knew this feeling, but in that moment it caught me so off guard that I felt a little sick. I fought to stay focussed on instinct, grasping at straws to make myself remember where I was and what I was doing, but I was being pulled back, gently, but firmly. It felt like slipping out of my own skin and taking a back seat in my own body.
Suddenly I was moving. I couldn’t exactly see what was going on around me—not in the traditional sense—but I still retained a degree of awareness. I was surrounded by a pounding silence, like being locked in a soundproof room, but certain senses still crept in from the outside. I couldn’t remember the last time I had dissociated so hard. Somewhere in the back of my mind, I knew what was happening, and part of me was so happy, but the other part of me was terrified.
You can’t do this right now, I thought, my own voice little more than a distant echo in my mind. All that I received in response was a dismissive chuckle, but a sense of reassurance came with it. He was confident that he knew what he was doing. For now I would wait.
Sometime later—it was hard to know how much time had passed—I regained partial consciousness, enough that I could plainly see what was in front of me even though I still wasn't in control of my body. I stood inside what appeared to be a shrine—the Naka Shrine. The walls were lined with candles that offered minimal lighting, and on the ground in front of me was a dislodged slab of stone with an intricate pattern of writing that I couldn’t decipher, but the symbol in the middle was immediately recognisable as the Sharingan. The slab seemed to have been moved to reveal a stone staircase that led down into the darkness, only a faint source of light illuminating from the bottom.
“Are they down there?” I felt myself ask, my voice barely a whisper.
Let’s find out.
My body moved of its own accord—or rather, that of the one who held it hostage. Step by careful step, we descended deeper into the shrine. At the bottom, a dim corridor stretched before us, distant voices carrying from deeper within. The mouth of the corridor opened into a small room, but we didn’t go quite that far, lingering just close enough to be within earshot. My anxiety was bubbling up again, but since I wasn’t in control of my body, my chakra signature remained suppressed. Despite having had no personal training, he really was quite talented at staying undetected.
“...to roam free,” a voice hissed from within the room. I struggled to make out most of the words. “He’s clearly disturbed. He’ll turn against us if we don’t…”
“We do not decide his fate. Hokage-sama has made it clear…” That was Hikaku, I realised quickly. I strained my ear to hear more.
“Since when do Senju get to meddle in Uchiha affairs?” another voice barked, followed by a hiss of shushing. They continued, more quietly now, “Banishment will only fuel his ire and give him reason to retaliate.”
They must have been talking about Madara. I had expected underlying discord in the wake of Madara’s actions, but for his clan to meet in secret to discuss…hunting him down? Was that what they meant?
“Madara-sama is unmatched in strength and skill,” Hikaku stated. “Only Hokage-sama would be capable of facing him head-on. We would only be marching ourselves to our deaths.”
“So you agree that he’s dangerous? That he might try to harm us?”
“Don’t twist my words, Jun’ichi.”
“If there’s one thing we can agree on, it’s that Madara-sama is a threat.”
My eyes widened. That was Chigiri, wasn’t it? I regained just an ounce of motor control to dig my nails into my palm so as to suppress the urge to look around the corner.
“Uchiha have always held our ground against threats to our family, even our own blood. This is nothing new. The only difference now is that the village is our family and it’s our obligation to protect them as they would protect us. Hokage-sama prefers a more passive approach. It’s up to us to take the initiative.”
No… Why was he saying all of that? There was no need for anyone to go after Madara now that he’d been “exiled”. If they did, he would be unprepared. He was only supposed to lie in wait for the opportunity to challenge Hashirama one on one. Why was Chigiri trying to instigate a confrontation over this? Wasn’t he the one who had talked about how peaceful this place was? Didn’t he realise that he was endangering that peace by rallying for battle?
“Chigiri-san is right. We have to strike first.”
“We can be ready to send a team of elite by sundown tomorrow.”
“I’m sorry, Hikaku-san, but you’ve let the Senju get to your head. We’re doing this whether you agree or disagree.”
“...Then I can’t stop you, but your actions are your own, as are the consequences that will follow.”
There was the sound of shuffling from within the room, the gathered clansmen getting up to make their way out of the shrine. It was then that I realised the influence over my body had all but vanished, leaving me in complete control. My heart rate jumped. I felt all go still inside the room, everyone holding their breaths.
“...Someone’s there.”
“What are you waiting for? Go after them!”
Now would be a good time to run, that “helpful” voice suggested. I fought the urge to roll my eyes as I took off in a sprint back down the corridor toward the stairway.
Thanks for the advice, dickhead.
I had yet to put it into practice, but following my instinct, I willed my chakra into my feet to carry me faster, and oh, was I fast. Faster than I could keep up with myself, in fact, so as soon as I stumbled out of the shrine, a group of shinobi hot on my heels, I frantically looked around for somewhere to hide. It occurred to me a second too late that if I couldn’t suppress my chakra signature again, hiding was pointless.
I kept running, normally at first, but an Uchiha appeared in front of me to block my path. I darted to the left, still trying to make my way toward the exit of the compound, but when chakra surged into my feet this time, it was more than I had anticipated. I tripped over my own feet just metres away from the gates, skidding across the ground with a hard knock to the chin. I was the slightest bit dazed as I felt two people grab my arms and hoist me upright to be faced with none other than Hikaku in front of me. His expression was unreadable, and while I imagined he must have been royally pissed off about an outsider eavesdropping on their secret meeting in their secret meeting place, he refrained from showing it.
“What do you think you’re doing, Kai-san?” he questioned.
I thought about scrambling for some excuse, but my mind was still all over the place from my failed attempt to escape and everything I had just overheard.
“You can’t kill him,” I blurted out instead. “You don’t understand. You’re all making a huge mistake.”
“What do you know?” one of the Uchiha holding me up barked. “You’re not one of us. You don’t even belong here. You’re barely even a shinobi.”
“So what?” I barked back, temper rising. I never did handle insults well. “What do I know? Apparently a hell of a lot more about your leader than you do.”
“Why, you little—”
“Back off.”
My captors froze as another clansman stepped before me, swiftly catching the raised hand aimed at me. I lifted my head enough to see that it was Chigiri, pinning his kinsman with a hard glare.
“You lay a hand on him and you lose it,” he warned. “Let him go.”
“Mind your place, Chigiri—”
In a rapid series of movements, Chigiri knocked the two Uchiha to the ground. Without their support, I slumped to my knees, hissing from the pain of landing on fresh bruises and skid marks. All the while Hikaku stood silently, observing, though I could feel the rest of the gathered clansmen bristle. Rubbing at a sore spot on my arm from the harsh hands that had held me there, I looked up at Chigiri again, but his scowl was directed at everyone but me.
“Anyone else who wants to pick a fight with Kai has to go through me,” he announced. “If we slip back into our old ways, then nothing will change and Konohagakure will fall. If we want to survive here, we have to broaden our ideals beyond our own clan. We will hear what Kai has to say.”
When he finally looked down at me, his gaze had softened, and he offered his hand to help me back onto my feet. I hesitated before taking it, his words from earlier still fresh in my mind, but eventually I gripped his hand, allowing him to pull me up. I was beginning to ache, my legs unsteady and my chest burning beneath my bindings. Still, I took a deep breath and forced air into my lungs, slowly turning to face the Uchiha around me. In spite of Chigiri’s words, they still regarded me with suspicion and scorn, not unlike how they had looked at Madara right up until his banishment.
“...You can’t go after Madara,” I said once more, meeting each of their cynical eyes in turn. “You have to trust Hashirama’s decision.”
“And why should we trust you?” one of them asked, crossing her arms. “We know nothing of where you came from or why you’re here. You were brought in by a madman, you infiltrated our sacred shrine to spy on us, and now you expect us to believe anything you say?”
“He’s not—” I paused and took another breath, willing myself to stay calm. “He’s not mad. And I’m sorry for spying, but…please just trust that your Hokage knows what he’s doing. You all chose him to lead this village for a reason, didn’t you? Why doubt him now?”
“He’s a Senju,” another spat. “We may have agreed to the treaty that brought us here, but it’s far too soon to forget the Uchiha blood he’s spilled.”
“And how much Senju blood is on your hands?” I countered. “Can any of you say you’ve never taken someone’s life?”
The answering silence spoke for itself.
“There’s no forgetting that. No one is asking you to forget. All that I’m asking you to do is wait.”
“Wait for what?”
I turned around to face the one who voiced the question, meeting Hikaku’s calculating eyes. He seemed doubtful, certainly, but also interested in whatever I had to say. He wanted a reason to stop this from happening. Perhaps against my better judgement, I was willing to give it to him.
“...Everything Madara said was an act,” I explained, hoping that revealing the truth now wouldn’t be a mistake. It was the only thing I could think of that would stay their hands. “He doesn’t believe in salvation through the Infinite Tsukuyomi any more than you do. He only needed you to believe that he had turned against the village.”
“...Why would he do that?”
I turned back around to find Shirayuki had stepped forward from amidst the crowd, a desperation to understand etched into her features. It was the most emotion I had ever seen her express.
“Why would he turn us against him?”
“There’s a…man who wants to manipulate him into doing something awful,” I said. “He was only ever going to reveal himself if he believed that Madara had turned his back on Konoha. We’re doing this to capture him.”
“We?” This time it was Mitsuri who spoke. I nodded at him.
“Hashirama is aware of what Madara is doing. He exiled Madara to show…that man that he isn’t welcome here anymore.”
“So what are we supposed to do?” someone else asked. “Just…sit around and wait for him to come back?”
I pursed my lips.
“...There’s one more thing he has to do before he can return,” I said.
I cast a glance at Chigiri, searching for some sort of reassurance in his eyes. Even though he couldn’t have known what I needed to say, he nodded for me to continue anyway. I had no idea what I’d done to deserve such a supportive friend as he was.
“...To lure the man out of hiding, he has to battle Hashirama to the death.”
The Uchiha had many more questions about my vague explanation, most of which I couldn’t answer for fear of revealing how much I knew of past and future events. Hashirama, Madara, and Tobirama had handled it rather well when they found out, all things considered, but I couldn’t be so loose-tongued with the general public. They didn’t have the necessary context of my very existence in this place to be able to wrap their heads around it all. It seemed hours had passed before they finally relented with their interrogation, Hikaku finally dismissing them all while he and Chigiri accompanied me back to Madara’s house.
“There’s still the matter of your trespassing on sacred Uchiha ground,” Hikaku said once we were inside and kneeling around the short table in the tatami room, three cups of green tea in front of us courtesy of himself. “With how little control over your chakra you still have, I’m surprised you even managed to get inside undetected.”
Ah, yeah. That.
“...Lucky break, I guess,” I evaded, sipping at my tea. I winced through the pain of swallowing; my whole head was killing me after the tumble I took earlier. “I really am sorry. I just… I knew something was going on and after everything that had happened, I was worried—”
“You care about him,” Hikaku said, cutting me off. “There’s no shame in that, but you must understand that such actions will not be tolerated again. You may be residing here for the time being, but clan matters are none of your concern.”
“Isn’t that a little harsh, Hikaku?” Chigiri asked with a raised brow, hands folded around his own cup. “He’s practically a part of the family. You saw him with Kagami—”
“Irrelevant,” Hikaku said, lifting his hand toward Chigiri. He really did not want to let anyone finish their sentences, huh? “Our role in this village notwithstanding, each clan is entitled to self-government. We may be accommodating to outsiders, but that doesn’t make them one of us.” His gaze settled back on me, wary as he looked me up and down where I sat. “Unless you have intention to court Madara-sama—”
This time I was the one to interrupt him as an air bubble firmly lodged itself in my throat and trapped a large gulp of tea in the process. I coughed until I was red in the face (at least, that was the excuse I would use to justify to myself why my cheeks felt so hot) and my eyes watered before I could wheeze out a word to my defence.
“I— No. I-I’m not courting anyone,” I declared, looking anywhere but at the two sitting at the table with me. “What a— What a presumptuous thing to say! You think— How dare you.”
It came ever so naturally to turn the tables on Hikaku and I had to admit that it was rather gratifying to watch his eyes widen and his face turn a little pale. His gaze flickered toward Chigiri, but the latter was looking down into his tea as he took a long, long sip of it.
“I…didn’t mean to offend you. I was only—”
“Trying to imply that I’m a gold digger, huh? Is that it?”
“No, not at all! I just—”
“The audacity! I can’t believe this. When Madara finds out—”
“Don’t—”
Hikaku’s plea for mercy died on his lips when he finally caught sight of the smirk on my face. The edges of panic vanished from his eyes in an instant as he straightened himself and crossed his arms, frowning at me. A muffled snort escaped Chigiri and that was all it took for both of us to dissolve into fits of laughter. Oh, man, was it fun to mess with old people.
“Very funny,” Hikaku drawled. “If you’re quite finished, I’d like us to return to the more serious matters at hand.”
It took another moment or two, but Chigiri and I finally regained our composure enough to bite back the snickers. I cleared my throat, swallowing down the urge to grin.
“Of course.”
Hikaku closed his eyes and sighed.
“Tell me again why we should believe this story of yours,” he said.
“I already—”
“Again.”
I pressed my lips together, squinting at him, but I complied nonetheless.
“The man who wants to manipulate Madara won’t come out of hiding unless he turns his back on the village,” I reiterated. “He altered that piece of rock in your shrine to try to convince Madara that the Infinite Tsukuyomi was a good idea, but it’s actually the opposite, and Madara found out about that and he wants to deal with that man once and for all.”
“And who is this man?” Hikaku asked. I chewed on that one for a moment, debating. Hikaku narrowed his eyes. “You will tell me.”
“It’s not going to make any more sense if I do tell you,” I said. “I mean, let’s be real here, you won’t really believe me until you hear it straight from the horse’s mouth.” Hikaku stared at me.
“...The horse…?” I rolled my eyes.
“What I mean is that nothing I say will matter until Madara comes back and explains it himself,” I clarified. “That won’t be for at least another week, though, maybe longer if Zet—...if that man takes his time showing himself.”
“Alright. You also said that Hokage-sama and Madara-sama would fight to the death,” Hikaku pointed out. “If you’re so sure Madara-sama will return, does that mean Hokage-sama will die?”
“No, it’s gonna be a fake fight. Well, it’ll be real right up until the last second,” I said. “Madara has to fake his death to seal the deal.”
“I don’t understand.” Hikaku furrowed his brows. “If this enemy you speak of wants to manipulate him, what would he gain from Madara-sama’s death?"
“That…isn’t a question I can answer. It’s not my place.”
At least, it didn’t feel right to give up that information. It might paint Madara in even more of a bad light than he already was. If I told them I knew about Madara’s Izanagi ability, it would open up a whole new can of worms about how I could know that and why Madara didn’t just use it anyway. The whole point of this farce was to cause minimal damage.
Hikaku closed his eyes and pinched the bridge of his nose.
“You don’t like to make things easy, do you?” he observed. I shrugged.
“Nothing is ever easy, especially not this.”
“Well,” Chigiri chimed in, setting down his cup of tea to cross his arms, “if you’re confident that this mysterious plan will work, then I trust you. I admit I was ready to charge out there no holds barred, but it wouldn’t be very smart to get in Madara-sama’s way if he’s really doing what’s best for everyone.”
Hikaku scoffed.
“So you’ll listen to reason from this boy’s half-truths, but not when I tell you to think before you act? You need to straighten out your priorities, Chigiri-san.”
“In my defence, you weren’t making a very solid case for yourself, old man,” Chigiri said with a teasing smirk. “You have a ways to go before you carry the same gravitas as Madara-sama. Nobody’s ever going to follow you just because you tell them to.”
“That’s not—” Hikaku began to argue, but he seemingly thought better of it and sighed instead. “...Perhaps you’re right. That doesn’t mean you should be so disrespectful, though. I’m not that old, but I’m certainly more experienced than you are, brat.”
“Brat? Now that’s just mean.”
“Oh, being called names doesn’t feel nice, does it? What do you know.”
I chuckled at the two of them, nursing my own tea. I hadn’t had much of a chance to be around Hikaku outside of a training environment ever since he assigned my guard detail when I first arrived here, so it was interesting to see him in a more comfortable atmosphere. It was still something of a culture shock to see all these people—aunts and uncles and cousins and children—living together in such a tightly knit community where everyone treated each other like family even outside of their own households.
That wasn’t really something I got to experience growing up, probably on account of the detrimental individualist idealism that pervaded the U.S. and encouraged people to be selfish and greedy rather than take care of each other. Even though the Uchiha had almost stormed after their own leader on a manhunt, it was only because they were scared and confused, because Madara drove that artificial wedge between them and made them think that if they weren’t with him, they were against him and vice versa. Still, they had all come together as one when faced with that assumed reality. Their bonds were stronger than just their blood.
Or, perhaps, that was what made them so strong. It was easy to forget that, in a time and place like this, blood was the only thing that had mattered for a very long time. For a lot of people, it was the only thing they could trust. Family always came first and everyone treated each other in ways that upheld that value.
I was happy for the children who got the chance to grow up in a community like that, now surrounded by even more communities who believed the same.
“Kai-san? Are you okay?”
I blinked up at Chigiri when he addressed me, only to find both him and Hikaku looking at me warily. It was then that I felt the water gathering in my eyes and I was quick to brush it away with my hand, chuckling a little self-consciously.
“Uh, yeah, I’m just…” I sniffled, looking back down into my cup of still-warm tea. A soft smile crept onto my face. “...I’m really glad to be here. I’m grateful to all of you for taking me in.”
Silence followed, but after a moment, Hikaku spoke up again, and I glanced back up at him to catch a rare smile on his face, as well.
“You’re welcome here for as long as you like,” he said. “As far as I’m concerned…this is your home.”
Home.
Why did that word make me so damn emotional? When I first turned up here, all I wanted to go was find a way out, but now, this village, these people…this was my home. I realised then that if I never made it back to the “real world”, or if I never moved on from this one…I would be okay with that. I was content here. I wanted to be here. I wanted to live here.
I want to live.
That was what finally made the dam give way. Chigiri was quick to shuffle over to me and wrap an arm around my shoulder and I leaned into him as I cried for a wholly different reason this time. What an overpowering feeling it was to find my will to live again. Maybe it was temporary, maybe this was all a dream, but goddammit, I didn’t care. All I knew was that I was happy.
After I had calmed down and they were both satisfied that I was okay, Chigiri and Hikaku made to take their leave of Madara’s house for the time being, but before Hikaku left, I had to ask him a question.
“Do you…happen to know what business Hashirama has today?” I asked. “It’s just…I tried to go see him earlier and the guards wouldn’t let me into the building, so I was just wondering…”
Hikaku blinked.
“Did no one tell you? The Uzumaki clan arrived in the village today,” he explained. “Hokage-sama and Uzumaki-sama are discussing the terms of their alliance.”
Oh.
That meant that Mito Uzumaki was in the village. That meant that she was here to…
Oh.
I straightened my back, nodding at Hikaku.
“Thank you. I didn’t know.”
Hikaku nodded back and turned to leave then. Everything always had to happen at once, didn’t it? This was possibly the worst time for the Uzumaki to show up in Konoha to propose the arranged marriage between Hashirama and Mito. After all, Hashirama had just banished the man who was about to drag him out to bloody battle in just a few days’ time and then waltz right back into the village like nothing was amiss…
Would that impact the Uzumaki’s decision to ally with the village? Would they understand if Hashirama tried to explain? Would Mito understand, or would she think her husband-to-be an unfit leader? How much would we need to reveal if they weren’t convinced by the cover story? If not now, then would Hashirama eventually come clean to his future wife? How would she take it then? Would they even get married in the first place?
Oh, boy. This was either going to be a huge mess, or I was stressing out over nothing. I didn’t know if I would ever stop yearning for the convenience of a text message to find out about something I needed to know then and there.
I ruminated over this new development for a few hours, trying and failing to bore myself into slumber by lying in bed, but eventually I found myself wandering out of the Uchiha District as the sun was setting. I strayed away from the usual path I took during my walks through the village with Chigiri, sticking to the outskirts where there were fewer buildings and more trees. Going on walks had become rather calming, an easy way to help clear my mind. Normally I had Chigiri by my side to go back and forth with, but I didn't mind the silence this time.
My eyes followed the path before me by tracing made-up patterns in the way the soft orange light filtered through the leaves overhead and peeked through the tree trunks. I tried to recall the last time I had allowed myself simply to exist alongside nature before coming to this world, to no avail. There was never any time to between work and the next hyperfixation that kept me glued to my phone or computer or TV. I had actively avoided going outside so much, in fact, that I regularly had groceries, meals, and other necessities and luxuries delivered to my doorstep rather than venture outside. No wonder I was so fucking depressed when I had deprived myself of natural beauties like this for so long.
Being here felt...right, somehow. Even though I had stumbled every step of the way, and would surely continue to stumble, I felt as if I had a purpose for being here. Maybe that purpose was to do exactly what I was already doing—altering the timeline to prevent the tragedy of the Fourth War—or maybe it was something else, but either way, everything about this place seemed to beckon me in ways I’d never felt before. Was this, perhaps, Fate's way of correcting its mistake? Was I never meant to be reborn into that other world in the first place? Maybe I was always supposed to have ended up here and something got lost in translation, or maybe I was only supposed to have existed in that world long enough to come to terms with the secrets of myself...
What if I needed to remember all my past lives in order to fulfil my purpose in this one? It would make sense. My insane ramblings wouldn't have held nearly as much weight if I hadn't had the memories of experience to back them up. I had a unique understanding of timelines that I wouldn't have had if I never remembered being reincarnated in the first place. Not to mention my soulbonds...
I paused in my step, staring blindly at the ground in front of me as I turned my attention inward. At first I'd thought I was just imagining things, but there was no mistaking it. Earlier, that was Issei who took control of my body, and before that... Before that must have been Tooru.
I placed my hand softly over my heart, lips stretching into a smile. They were still with me after all. I wasn't alone here. I didn't lose them. Which meant that...
My heart leapt with excitement as the thought began to form in my head. I pivoted on my heel to turn around and head back toward the village proper, but I froze in place when I was met with a figure standing there. It took a brief moment for my fight or flight instinct to pass before I recognized Tobirama's massive fur collar. I blinked up at his stern frown and the deep furrow of his brow. Somehow he made me feel guilty despite having done nothing wrong.
"What are you doing out here?" he asked.
"I was just taking a walk. What? Am I not allowed to do that by myself now?" I retorted, crossing my arms with a slight pout on my lips.
"No," he answered without pause, carrying on before I could open my mouth to argue. "Just because we know you're not insane now doesn't mean it's any safer to let you roam freely on your own. If someone were to get their hands on the knowledge you possess, it could be disastrous for our village."
I pouted some more. Everything he said made perfect sense, but that didn't mean I had to like it.
"Do you really expect me to have a bodyguard follow me around day and night?" I asked, throwing my arms out to my sides helplessly. "Can't I just have some time to myself that's not being constantly scrutinised? A guy has needs, you know."
It was hard to see in the fading light, but I could just make out the way Tobirama's pale skin lit up red as he suddenly averted his gaze and tensed his jaw. Okay, embarrassing Tobirama was just as gratifying as it was to embarrass Madara. Looks like I was two for two, baby.
He cleared his throat before speaking again.
"I...hadn't considered... It—It hardly seems productive—"
I let him flounder over his words for a few more seconds with a smirk on my face before mercifully sparing him the distress of trying to say it out loud without actually saying it.
"Relax, snowflake. That's not what I meant," I said. I watched the tension evaporate from his body in an instant, though the colour in his face took longer to fade away. "I just meant that it would be nice to—"
"What did you just call me?"
"What?"
I blinked. He stared me down.
"What did you just call me?" he repeated, slowly this time. I lifted a brow.
"...I called you 'snowflake'?" I shrugged. "It's just, like...a nickname, you know? I wasn't trying to insult you."
He seemed to consider that answer for a long moment before abruptly returning to the previous topic.
"...I'll allow you one hour a day unsupervised," he began, "but you are not to leave the village walls. If you try, I'll know and you'll lose even that privilege. Understood?"
"Just one hour?" I complained. He narrowed his eyes.
"Understood?"
I slumped my shoulders and let out an exaggerated groan, rolling my eyes.
"Fine. I guess one hour is better than nothing..." I relented.
Tobirama nodded and stepped aside, gesturing for me to start walking back the way I came. I shuffled past him, stuffing my hands into the pockets of my yukata as we walked back toward the Uchiha District. When I glanced up at the sky through the canopy of trees, it was much darker out now. Time really flew by, huh?
"How did Hashirama's meeting with the Uzumaki go?" I asked idly, glancing at Tobirama over my shoulder. He only briefly met my eyes before looking away again.
"...Shouldn't you already know that?" he pointed out. I shrugged.
"I know what the end result is gonna be," I admitted. "I don't know how fast that happens or any of the little details in between."
There was a long pause after that, prompting me to look up at him again. He kept his eyes on the ground this time as he slowly came to a halt. I stopped a couple steps ahead, tilting my head at him.
"...What's wrong?"
"...Hashirama is expected to marry the Uzumaki heiress by the next full moon in order to secure their alliance," Tobirama said, his voice a stark contrast to what I would have expected to hear from him. I furrowed my brows.
"But...that's good, right?" I asked.
Tobirama finally met my eyes again, his gaze nothing short of withering.
"Mito Uzumaki is a royal bitch."
Well, this already sounded like a fun engagement. I couldn't wait to see how the wedding would turn out.